Women’s Sexuality: Sex Toys, Orgasms & Equality- Oh My!
Intro by Kelli Davis
Well hello, you sexy lady explorers!
Today we are talking about two of my favorite things–women’s sexuality and TOYS! I love seeing dramatic shifts in areas that illustrate growth and opportunity for women, and the sex toy industry is absolutely one of them. 50 years ago, the idea of a sexually independent woman masturbating and not needing a man to experience sexual pleasure was seen as threatening and labeled dirty.
What’s been really exciting with the rise of the sex-positivity movement, is the expansion of options and the increased accessibility to ways women can enhance and enjoy sex. What was once a hush-hush topic that polite ladies didn’t discuss, is now a no holds bar all you can eat buffet ripe for some fun locker room talk.
Unfortunately, I think sexual pleasure is still not as important in feminism as it should be.
In America, we are way more comfortable talking about sex in a negative way, (sexual violence, trafficking, assault, STI’s) than we are comfortable having conversations about women’s sexuality and sexual pleasure.
Also, can we talk about the orgasm gap for a minute? Because it’s a very real thing! It’s a real tragedy that sexual pleasure isn’t taken as seriously. Orgasm should be seen as a human right! Like healthcare is a human right– experiencing amazing orgasms is a human right. All women need to be having orgasms because almost all men are.
In a study by The Kinsey Institute found that women who use sex toys regularly have better sex lives, stronger orgasms, and are more likely to stay on top of their sexual health than women who don’t use them. I know that all of our readers are badass women who want to be on top of all areas of their lives. So without further ado, we want to share a list of our and our best girlfriend’s favorite sex toys!!
10 Best Sex Toys for Women
My absolute and personal favorite sex toys all come from LELO. LELO claims to be “the most refined, most luxurious and most iconic objects of desire in the world. LELO has established a heritage based on quality, on unexpected innovation and on being entirely different from everything and everyone else.” And I find this to be absolutely true. I love how sleek, minimal, and aesthetically pleasing their products are. I also appreciate that they aren’t just producing some more big silicone wang-wannabe products. My personal favorites are the SORAYA (think simultaneous clitoral and G-spot stimulation with the prettiest rabbit vibrator), and the SONA (Meet the sonic massager that stimulates 75% more of your clitoris for a feeling that will change your life, one orgasm at a time.). -KD
I’m a huge fan of the Rabbit Penis Ring by SCREAMING O. It’s not only a rabbit, but also a vibrating dick ring—amazing right?! This toy is straightforward, simple to operate, and this silicon ring pulls quadruple duty by squeezing his D, stimulating it with some vibrations, plus stimulating both your clit and vagina, all in one. That’s a touch down in my book! – Liv
Hands down my goto and most used toy is the Dream Bullet Vibrator by LOVEHONEY. The bullet is the perfect vibrator, in my opinion, let me elaborate- it’s small (think traveling), simple, and can be used in lots of ways. This inexpensive toy has three speeds, seven vibration patterns, and is super quiet. It’s like the little black dress of vibes, if a dress could give you orgasms. – GCP
I think every straight woman needs to own a cock ring. It literally turns your man’s junk into a vibrator. It’s awesome. My personal favorite cock ring is the Big O Multi-Stage Vibrating Penis Ring that I bought at Adam & Eve. – Claire the O lover
You asked, I’ll answer: I love my Icicles No 48 Glass Flower Butt Plug… Using a butt plug adds pleasurable pressure and hands-free stimulation during any type of sexual play, from oral sex and vaginal intercourse to an intimate massage. I recommend starting with something small and not too scary. Your butthole is literally TINY. Don’t go shoving some huge thing up in there right away. You don’t want to hurt yourself. It should all be fun, refreshing and gentle on your rear. -Back-door Betty
I’m a huge fan of the Eva. It’s a palm-sized toy that looks a little like a beetle and sits over the clit during sex. It’s completely hands-free. Its wings hook under the lips of the labia. It makes me come every time. Best couple’s massager I’ve ever found! -Brittany
I love the Tenga Iroha Mini. Great for clitoral stimulation during sex or masturbation. I love that it has powerful vibrations, is waterproof, and takes up so little space. -HH
This was a game-changer for me!! I squirt and gush non- stop when I use it. Complete g-spot stimulation. -TKH
Wearable Vibrator Clitoris and G-Spot Stimulator Remote Control Vibrate Masturbation Dildo Toys for Adult, Invisible Wearable Vibrating Wand USB Rechargeable Silicone Clitoris Vagina Massager for Women
Ridiculously long name (go Amazon! Lol) but it’s worth every penny. I wear it out, my partner has the remote usually. It’s a dead-on g-spot stim for me. -RR
Every woman needs to have this in her sex toy drawer. It has multiple vibration speeds, a variety of pulse options and you can get attachments to put on the end. If you are having sex with another woman, you can use it in the scissoring position to create a connection and a sensation that offers simultaneous pleasure (and maybe even simultaneous orgasms). It’s fun to use alone or while playing with a male partner. The vibration is strong enough to give both parties extreme pleasure when used in a partnership. Expect multiple orgasms when using alone. -AB
Annette’s Closing Thoughts
Honestly, we haven’t even scratched the surface, when it comes to sex toys and women’s sexuality. These are the go-tos our open-minded sisters shared with us, and they are perfect for women looking to experiment. Don’t worry, we’ll circle back and talk about the varieties of fun stuff available out there, some of which you may never have even heard of.
Like Kelli said earlier, it’s exciting to see more and more products coming out designed to specifically enhance women’s pleasure. Gone are the days of unfulfilling sex comprised of clumsy clit play followed by penetration and…done? Sex toys allow women to explore their own bodies, sensations and pleasure zones. Even if you don’t use them with partners (I highly recommend you do), they help you to understand your own pleasure, and what works for you better so that when you have sex, you can reach that orgasm you’ve been yearning for.
Sexual empowerment is an important part of women’s sexuality and the feminist movement. It’s true, women need to feel comfortable and able to talk about sexual trauma and abuses, but it’s also important for us to be open about sexual pleasure and our sensual drive. It’s time for us to shut down slut-shaming and the stereotypes attached to women who “dare” to enjoy sex and sexual exploration.
It’s time for us to have all the orgasms–and the really good ones too. Because like Kelli said, having incredible orgasms is our right. Or, at least it should be.
Now get out there and do some shopping.