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HomeMental HealthFriday Feminist Mantra: Know Your Worth

Friday Feminist Mantra: Know Your Worth


Lessons from Women Who Know Their Worth and engage in self-care


I recently read an inspiring quote that got me thinking. It said, “when you learn how much you’re worth, you’ll stop giving people discounts”. Ladies, how do we not all know our worth inherently? How is it that we are still buying into and perpetuating outdated models of programming that no longer support or endorse women? 

The quote really got me thinking about the women I know who are — and are not — living life in a way that screams, “I know what I bring to the table— in fact, I bought the damn thing — and you can take it or leave it!” I started mentally compiling a list of attributes, attitudes, and self-care habits that I found many of these women who know their worth share. I realized some of these things I was already doing (go me!), and some of them needed work. But, all of them will lead me down a path I want to walk daily. 

But before we get started, your feminist mantra:

know what I bring to the table, and I’ll accept no less in return!

women who know their worth, self-care

20 Habits Women Who Know Their Worth Practice


The following are 20 habits that a bad-ass woman who knows her worth and engages in self-care, practices regularly: 

  1. She asks a million questions. She doesn’t just go with the flow, she wants to understand the “why” behind all things she is a part of. She isn’t concerned about looking foolish for asking a question, she’s more concerned about being foolish for NOT asking the question. 
  2. She knows how to wield the word, “NO”. When a woman who knows her worth and engages in self-care makes a commitment, it’s because she has thought it out and has decided that saying “yes” is what she really wants. She doesn’t agree to something simply because saying “NO” can be uncomfortable. She has decided that if something isn’t a “hell yes” for her, it’s a “hell NO”. 
  3. She is goal oriented. She has taken the time to figure out what she wants and needs, and is a woman with a plan to get after it. She knows that she can accomplish anything with the proper planning and motivation. She is always working towards forward movement. Try not to get in her way. 
  4. She knows how to dress the part. A woman who knows her worth understands that we all must play a certain role in order to gain certain advantages, and isn’t afraid to look a part. She knows what looks best on her, and more importantly how to dress in a manner that makes her feel best. Whatever her style, she rocks it apologetically and only because it empowers her. 
  5. She has an amazing power pose. Body language is such a huge part of how humans communicate. She knows how to stand tall and proud, in a way that sends a clear statement that she is a competent woman on a mission. 
  6. She embraces both her strengths and areas of weaknesses. A woman who knows her worth doesn’t play small by downplaying her own strengths. And just as much as she owns them, she also owns her weaknesses without apology or embarrassment. She freely admits that she is a work in progress, and is open to learning new things. She is also happy to share what she has already mastered.
  7. She knows how to pick her battles. She is too busy accomplishing things and slaying at life to sweat the small stuff. She can’t be distracted by things that don’t light her soul on fire. 
  8. She has better things to talk about than other people. A woman who knows her worth has recently traveled somewhere super cool, or achieved a goal, or learned something fantastic, or has something so funny to share with you, that there is no time for talking about other people who aren’t around. She has far too many interesting things to share so gossip just doesn’t make the cut. 
  9. She focuses on solutions. This isn’t a woman who sits around complaining and lamenting on how unfair life is. She is constantly strategizing ways to solve her own problems. In fact, she looks a challenge dead in the eye and gives it a little wink! 
  10. She makes self-care a priority. A woman knows her worth totally gets that being a female martyr is so 1950’s and that 2019 is all about women making self-care a priority. She has learned that if she spends her life living for others, it will be a life wasted. She is at her best and gives back the most when she makes being her best self a priority. When she is in balance with giving and taking of self, she’s an unstoppable force. 
  11. She embraces fear and discomfort. She doesn’t run away from things that are scary or uncomfortable. She realizes that things that are worth having, often come with a price tag of being uncomfortable or scared at first. She embraces these growth edges and leans in. She understands that risk is a necessary partner from time to time. 
  12. Takes responsibility for her own life. She is no damsel in distress! This woman knows that life doesn’t happen by sitting around waiting for someone else to save her. She doesn’t play the victim role, and she doesn’t vilify others. She accepts that her life is exactly what she makes of it. 
  13. She has strong female mentors. Strong women surround themselves with other strong women. These are women who mentor, encourage, collaborate, support and network with one another. 
  14. She celebrates the success of other’s. A woman who truly knows her worth has learned the value of building up and cheer leading other women. She is the woman complimenting another women’s achievement, in the background pumping her fist and saying “that’s my girl”. 
  15. She’s always down for an adventure. She lives her life in a way that keeps her open to new experiences. She is down to try new things and is excited to have all the experiences that call to her. She accepts that the universe is a friendly place that was meant to be explored. The whole world is her oyster. 
  16. She chooses her inner talk wisely. This is a wise woman indeed who is careful, intentional and loving with how she talks and thinks about herself at part of her self-care routine. When she makes a mistake, she lovingly encourages herself to try again. She is her number one source of encouragement, grace, empathy and love. 
  17. She understands that beauty and attractiveness is in the eye of the beholder. Whether she is a size 2 or a size 20, she rocks and owns her unique beauty. This is a woman who doesn’t waste time comparing herself to others, and instead celebrates all the parts that make her, HER. She doesn’t take it personally when she isn’t someone’s “type”, because she’s too busy being her own “type”. She knows you don’t need to be attractive to be confident, but you do need confidence to be attractive. 
  18. She validates herself. This kind of woman knows how to validate herself because knows her own principles and values, and what she offers to the world. A woman who has a purpose and knows it, doesn’t need other people to validate her because it becomes an in-house only job. The only person she ever is trying to make proud, is herself. 
  19. She accepts compliments with grace. She appreciates and warmly receives praise because she knows she deserves it. When someone takes the time to acknowledge her, she believes the kind words and stores them to boost motivation when she needs it. She uses compliments as feedback, an opportunity to discover new talents that could otherwise be taken for granted. 
  20. She practices gratitude. She makes actively searching and focusing on all of the things going right in her life a priority. She knows that life can be both beautiful and devastating at the same time and yet still she chooses to cultivate a deep sense of appreciation and wonder for all the  moments. 

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Kelli Davis
Kelli Davis
She Explores Life Co-Managing Editor, newly single mother of two, educator by trade, lover of words, and self discovering junkie on a mission to find a new normal.