Friday, March 29, 2024
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Friday Feminist Mantra for Fear

Happy Friday beautiful Biatches!! This Week’s Feminist Mantra for fighting fear!


“Get to know fear, love it, get in bed with it, and make it your bitch”- Kelli


Here’s the thing, so often when looking at gender equality, we forget to acknowledge our differences. Men and women are different and have different skill sets. I have found so much value in studying, befriending, understanding, observing, and loving men. I believe that the path to creating equality amongst the sexes is to fundamentally understand our differences, celebrate them, and use our advantage and disadvantages accordingly.

I’m naturally leery of people who say that men and women are the same. That’s bullshit. While we are the same species, we are wired completely differently, and for damn good reasons! Women were wired to seek a mate that could provide for them and their offspring, in order to perpetuate the continuation of our species. Men were wired to take risks in order to provide for his mate and offspring, again, to perpetuate the continuation of our species. Obviously, times have changed, as we are evolving constantly as a human race, but at the end of the day, we are still wired differently and men are still more naturally inclined and encouraged to use fear as a motivator than women.

One of the coolest observations I have made regarding the other gender, is how differently men and women view and build relationships with fear. I suspect that if as women, we reframe the way we experience fear, we can grow at an accelerated rate. If we can develop a personal relationship that is so intimate with fear that it no longer has a hold on us, we can level the playing field.

So how does one go about building a relationship with fear you ask?


fear, mantra

Steps to building a relationship with fear

Step 1.
Acknowledge and identify things that scare you.

Step 2.
Feel all the feelings that come up. Don’t get stuck or caught up in judgment, just allow the feelings to exist and move by like clouds. Be an observer of these feelings.

Step 3.
Objective the fuck out of the feelings. Ask the hard questions of is it real? What is the story I’m telling myself about this experience? Is this a valid fear?

Step 4.
Reframe the fear. Start training yourself to process that feeling differently. When you start to feel anxious, tell yourself “My body is just preparing itself: I’m totally stoked, present, and ready for what’s next. By reframing emotion, we can turn what’s otherwise debilitating into something motivating.

Step 5.
Just fucking do it! Do what scares you over and over again, until it literally no longer has a hold on you! Be bold, brave and fierce, and watch the whole world open up and fall at your feet. Build confidence through conquering fears and developing new skills.

Ask yourself over and over again: What could happen in your life if you were brave in that one decisive moment when the fear made you want to quit?

Alright my little chickadees, I know you get my point, so get out there and conquer this weekend and find even just ONE way to make fear your little bitch- you’ve got this

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Kelli Davis
Kelli Davis
She Explores Life Co-Managing Editor, newly single mother of two, educator by trade, lover of words, and self discovering junkie on a mission to find a new normal.
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