In My Skin: A Fat Woman’s Story
January 9, 2019
In Her Skin is a column by Katt Marie that focuses on learning to love you, an exploration of the external influences on self-esteem and body image, and how to overcome them. More about Katt on FB.
In Her Skin: Meet Katt Marie
I went back and forth about what my inaugural piece should be about. I am committed to presenting topics in the areas of self-esteem, body image, body positivity, and factors that impact how we see ourselves. But, for this first foray, I decided that no formal topic would allow me to really share what I hope to achieve. In that spirit, I decided it would be best to simply introduce myself and let my thoughts flow naturally.
I have a Bachelors in Health Education focusing on prevention, and have studied for my Masters. I am a Certified Peer Recovery Mentor and was a Nurse in my early 20’s. I have loved and lost, been married and divorced, had children, and helped raise grandchildren.
I have owned my own home and lived in a shelter, and lost both parents and a sibling to disease. My first exposure to domestic abuse was as a very young child and continued until very recently. I was molested at 13, first hit by a man at 17, and nearly killed by one a few years ago.
I have been a fat —yes fat—girl for as long as I can remember.
Looking back over the years of my life, and what it was like growing up fat, I can link related experiences to decisions that put me at risk for traumatic events. In turn, I now realize the endless cycle of emotions and events that kept me hating myself—inside and out. Grade school taunts turning to vile adolescent teasing when I was the first to get breasts. Then there was the man who broke me—body and spirit—leaving me alone, homeless, addicted, and a felon.
The word “fat” is not a bad word. The negative connotation is a direct result of our mentality. We made it negative and have let it remain negative. We can also unmake it!
Fat is part of every human beings anatomy: Don’t have too much.
Fat is a descriptor: What a fat ass!
Fat is an opinion: Size 4 is the standard of beauty but the reality is size 14-16 is the average size of the American Woman.
Fat is a state of mind: I am healthy and active, and my weight is my business!
Now that you know a little about me, I hope you will be better able to understand the topics I talk about in future articles. My goal is to share my journey to loving my body and how that was impacted by all of the facets of life mentioned above.
I hope to present information from both personal and professional points of view in an effort to allow you to form opinions and make choices that will positively impact your lives and the lives of those you love. I would also love to hear from readers, with your stories and topic ideas.
So, who am I? I am a Queen, ruler of my own destiny. I am a Warrior, strong and empowered. I am a Survivor, resilient and repaired. I love my mind and my body, I love my heart and my soul. I am beautiful, inside and out.
I was 45 years old before I recognized these things about myself. Better Late than never!
Until next time, Blessings.
Please feel free to email your thoughts, ideas, wisdom, and stories to Katt.Marie.Explores.Life@gmail.com